inessential by Brent Simmons

Man knocks on my door, says I want to see more spam

Just minutes ago a guy came to my door — he’s from the DNC, he says. He’s collecting money to help win back the White House.

I brush him off, basically, hoping he’ll go away quickly.

But then he asks for 10 more seconds of my time, which I give him. He tells me that if I give by calling a number I see on TV, then that means I want to see more ads on TV.

Then he says that if I give via the Internet, that means I want to see more Internet spam.

If I give to him, that means I prefer grassroots, face-to-face — he gestures to his face and mine — interaction.

“I really do prefer the Internet,” I say. And then he goes away.

Wishing now I had told him to seek his bliss underground somewhere.